How should leaders respond when an employee gets upset with something that has been asked of them or shared with them?
The natural reaction is to get angry or frustrated in response, however, usually this is the worst thing you can do.
Instead, leaders should take a step back and ask themselves: are my intentions clear?
Often employees become mad because they are filling in the blanks and making assumptions. They assume things like “my leader is criticizing me”, or “she must not trust my judgement”, or “he’s just trying to make things difficult.”
Almost always, these assumptions are wrong.
For this reason, when a team member seems to get upset, ask yourself ‘do they understand why I am sharing this with them?’
For example, let’s say a director in your organization wants your approval on something they’d like to do in their department. As you tell them no, you see they are visibly upset. Rather than getting angry or frustrated yourself, this is your clue that it’s time to make your intentions clear.
In this case, you might say something like, “Let me share why I’m saying no. The reason is because I think we need to look at all of our options first. The last thing I want is for this to go awry and have it negatively impact you or your team. More than anything, I want to help you be successful. This is what I purpose we consider…”
Don’t assume your people can read your mind or know “the why” behind your feedback, comments, or questions. Leaders who consistently make their intentions clear build stronger cultures and improve their effectiveness.
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